So I am home. And my family has been great, incredibly supportive and patient. Before I get to that, let me finish up my travel adventures. Malaysia was great one last time before heading home. I was able to see family and spend more time with everyone before I left. From cousins to grandparents to babies, I had a blast. I am hoping to find a job that will place me closer to my Malaysian family because I would love to get to know them better! We shall see how this all works out...
Now I have been home for a little less than a month. The weirdest feeling happened when I got on the plane to start my 30+ hours adventure home... it was like the last two years and eight months had been a dream. Gone... poof... out of the window. It was like it vanished. Yet, all I can do is think to how things in Armenia were or how cheap the food in Laos was. Its like my brain got stuck in this one specific area of my life and I cant think of anything else.
I went in to Peace Corps when I was 24, almost 25. I left when I was 27. There were a solid 24 years of life before Peace Corps, yet the only ones I can think of are the last two. The only things I can compare things to are the last two. I compare prices of food to how much meals were in Thailand. I compare clothes prices to how much they were in India. I compare public transportation to that found in Armenia. I talk about how I was certified in diving while in Turkey. I am kind of a jerk. Who else talks like this? Yet, this is all I can seem to talk about.
For a coming home/ welcome home thing, my family had a little get together. I invited two friends, one is another Returned Peace Corps volunteer from Cape Verde and also did a 3 month trip after service through Africa and the other is a teacher who worked in Spain for two years and took weekend trips to cities in Europe people would kill to visit. While at this dinner party, we kept stopping ourselves and checking what we said or how much we would say. Thank goodness they were there so they could take some of the attention off of me and they could also talk about their experiences.
Before leaving PC, we had a Close of Service conference where we talked about how to talk to people when you get back from PC. While that may sound stupid or redundant, it was pretty interesting. People on the whole cant relate to what we, as returned volunteers, have been through. We talk casually about things that people drop their jaws about. The culture shock that surprised me when I went to Armenia became common place and I am having more culture shock about people not understanding it than the shock I had when I experienced it. For example, outhouses. Using the bathroom outside. For me, it became normal. When I was first in Armenia, I was skittish about using it and wasnt comfortable with it but it became normal and not a big deal. Now when I talk about it to people who arent volunteers or dont have that experience, I am almost more shocked by their reaction to such things.
Another example that isnt PC related is the backpacking world. Oh my gosh, the backpacking world. I miss it sooo much!!!! In this world, you are surrounded by like minded people doing similar things. Especially in SE Asia, and I mentioned this before, but you are meeting the same people on a similar route. The vibes with everyone is so relaxed and adventurous that you get caught up in it and you think that everyone in the world is like this and that everyone in the world wants to be like this... and then you come home and talk about how you carried 15 kilos (about 40 lbs) of all of your belongings and felt like you had too much stuff. Then they look at you like you have a third eye because you wore the same shirt for a week and scoff at you for only owning flip flops and chacos! It is such a difference!
I think I am experiencing reverse culture shock and the most frustrating thing is I dont know what it is that I am being shocked from. When in Armenia, I could point to something and say, wow, that is different. And I would know what it was, even if it was a cultural thing, I could still pick it out. Here, I am familiar and unfamiliar to things in my own culture that I cant pick out what it is that surprises me or what it is that I am frustrated by... who knows, maybe I will figure it out, maybe I wont.
It also doesnt help that I dont have a job yet. I will begin substitute teaching once I take the sub class and that will be after March 6th. Being back in a routine and doing something will be helpful. I am also applying to quite a few places and now I get to play the waiting game... we will see. I am sure other volunteers can empathize with how I am feeling. And for my family that reads this, maybe it will explain some of my mood swings. :)
I am happy to be home. I am happy where I am in life, I am just trying to figure out how to blend what I have experienced with where I am at now. Not always the easiest.
Now I have been home for a little less than a month. The weirdest feeling happened when I got on the plane to start my 30+ hours adventure home... it was like the last two years and eight months had been a dream. Gone... poof... out of the window. It was like it vanished. Yet, all I can do is think to how things in Armenia were or how cheap the food in Laos was. Its like my brain got stuck in this one specific area of my life and I cant think of anything else.
I went in to Peace Corps when I was 24, almost 25. I left when I was 27. There were a solid 24 years of life before Peace Corps, yet the only ones I can think of are the last two. The only things I can compare things to are the last two. I compare prices of food to how much meals were in Thailand. I compare clothes prices to how much they were in India. I compare public transportation to that found in Armenia. I talk about how I was certified in diving while in Turkey. I am kind of a jerk. Who else talks like this? Yet, this is all I can seem to talk about.
For a coming home/ welcome home thing, my family had a little get together. I invited two friends, one is another Returned Peace Corps volunteer from Cape Verde and also did a 3 month trip after service through Africa and the other is a teacher who worked in Spain for two years and took weekend trips to cities in Europe people would kill to visit. While at this dinner party, we kept stopping ourselves and checking what we said or how much we would say. Thank goodness they were there so they could take some of the attention off of me and they could also talk about their experiences.
Before leaving PC, we had a Close of Service conference where we talked about how to talk to people when you get back from PC. While that may sound stupid or redundant, it was pretty interesting. People on the whole cant relate to what we, as returned volunteers, have been through. We talk casually about things that people drop their jaws about. The culture shock that surprised me when I went to Armenia became common place and I am having more culture shock about people not understanding it than the shock I had when I experienced it. For example, outhouses. Using the bathroom outside. For me, it became normal. When I was first in Armenia, I was skittish about using it and wasnt comfortable with it but it became normal and not a big deal. Now when I talk about it to people who arent volunteers or dont have that experience, I am almost more shocked by their reaction to such things.
Another example that isnt PC related is the backpacking world. Oh my gosh, the backpacking world. I miss it sooo much!!!! In this world, you are surrounded by like minded people doing similar things. Especially in SE Asia, and I mentioned this before, but you are meeting the same people on a similar route. The vibes with everyone is so relaxed and adventurous that you get caught up in it and you think that everyone in the world is like this and that everyone in the world wants to be like this... and then you come home and talk about how you carried 15 kilos (about 40 lbs) of all of your belongings and felt like you had too much stuff. Then they look at you like you have a third eye because you wore the same shirt for a week and scoff at you for only owning flip flops and chacos! It is such a difference!
I think I am experiencing reverse culture shock and the most frustrating thing is I dont know what it is that I am being shocked from. When in Armenia, I could point to something and say, wow, that is different. And I would know what it was, even if it was a cultural thing, I could still pick it out. Here, I am familiar and unfamiliar to things in my own culture that I cant pick out what it is that surprises me or what it is that I am frustrated by... who knows, maybe I will figure it out, maybe I wont.
It also doesnt help that I dont have a job yet. I will begin substitute teaching once I take the sub class and that will be after March 6th. Being back in a routine and doing something will be helpful. I am also applying to quite a few places and now I get to play the waiting game... we will see. I am sure other volunteers can empathize with how I am feeling. And for my family that reads this, maybe it will explain some of my mood swings. :)
I am happy to be home. I am happy where I am in life, I am just trying to figure out how to blend what I have experienced with where I am at now. Not always the easiest.
